Seriously? That happened?

Why is it that every time I go to McGuire's (a local steakhouse/brewery in Pensacola) I have some sort of crazy story to tell afterward?

A Case Study, from March 15-Apr 17 2009 (yes I was able to pinpoint the first visit for this study, that's what GOOD researchers do):

Situation Uno - Dinner with Mash (aka Husband), RobBob (aka Bro-in-Law), and CoolJ (my writing partner) on a busy Sunday night. Our waiter seemed to be very strongly suggesting we eat the pork chops. The conversation went as follows:

Waiter Eric: May I suggest the pork chops to you?
Table: (each person says no)
Waiter Eric: (looks at me with desperation in his eyes) Are you sure? They're very good pork chops, I highly recommend them.
Me: Um...yeah, definitely been thinking about this dinner for the past two hours and I'm pretty set on the prime rib.
Waiter Eric: (hesitating) um...ok then.

After that point it was approximately 8-10 minutes between every table visit. Seeing as I drink pretty quickly this was unacceptable. Then CoolJ pointed out to me that perhaps I should consider that McGuire's is ruled by the iron fist of Molly McGuire. We then spent 15 minutes riffing about how waiter Eric was being beaten by Molly's rolling pin every time he went in the kitchen for not upselling the pork chops. It then progressed to an idea for a skit that CoolJ and I are now writing that ends with Waiter Eric crying in his shower fully clothed while repeating 'Pork Chops' over and over and Molly McGuire then pulls him out of the shower and gives him a swirlie. Seriously, this is the stuff we come up with when left to our own devices at dinner...

Case Study #2 - Nothing too eventful here; just that Belle, her sister and I met a cool guy at the free drinks night (Thursday) and the evening progressed to us visiting a strip club (where I convinced Elle's sister to put a doller in her mouth and have the stripper remove it with her boobies ) and then a bit of Whataburger from across the street to wash it down. Yes, this evening was high class.

Case Study #3 - Again Ladies Drink Free Thursday night...last night. We sat at a table so we could gobble some grub. Then we realized our potential party of 8 (2 were running late) would NOT fit at the table for 6 we had, so I decided to discuss this with the waiter. *ahem*

Me: Sir, we were just notified that two more of our friends are coming and obviously there isn't enough room in this booth, is there anyway we could work this out so we could accomodate that?
Waiter Corey: Nope. You're all just going to have to scooch in.
Me: So then I guess I'm just going to have to not tip you.
Waiter Corey: (shocked I tell you, shocked) I'm sorry?
Me: Sorry, its just that I don't know how to remedy the situation and felt it best to bring it up to you BEFORE it becomes a problem, I would hope you'd respect that.
Waiter Corey: (still backpedeling from previous asshole comment) Yeah, I dont know either, I'll go ask my manager..............

And with that he got his answer, we got a bigger table, and yes I did tip him. But seriously, that happened? Just a wee bit bizarre for a waiter to be so...assholish.

Stay tuned, perhaps I'll have some other bizarre experience there again soon...

On a side note...Mash and RobBob are now strumming on their guitars to some song called "What Would Willie Nelson Do?" which is really making me miss the old days of toking grass and munchis. Le sigh.

|